Bill Bill Now I was the youngest of thirteen kids Growing up in a little country town Never had much to eat and the first thing I could speak Was patch it up and hand it down Daddy hauled fill for a textile mill Drank up what little money he made We had a three room shack with a john out back Only had paper when daddy got paid Now somehow I growed up, a really fat kid Though I never had enough to eat Them old rich kids would laugh and beat on me And their dogs would run me up and down the street Yeah, they'd bite my ankles and tear my clothes They all had fun with me And as I got fatter, them dogs got badder Things were 'bout as bad as they could be Now, I'd always wanted me a puppy But daddy said "They ain't no way Ain't near enough food to feed our brood And we ain't got none to give away" Then one night, drunk, in a poker game He won old Bill Teeter's hog I kinda liked that Poland China So I raised him like a dog Them old rich kids all had puppies But I never had no dog It was always me and Bill Bill The old fat boy and his hog Now old Bill Bill'd foller me to school every day And then waller outside and wait And I used to take him fishin' But he et up all the bait And he wasn't no good at hunting, either Cause everything I shot, he ate He was so dadburned slow that everywhere we'd go We always got there late But all of my troubles, they ended one day After Bill Bill got full growed Them old rich kids waited for us after school And jumped us when we come down the road Well when the dust had settled and the fur stopped flying Old Bill Bill grinned at me 'Cause howling rich kids and screamin' dogs Was all that you could see Well they must have learned a good lesson They never bothered us after that day Them old rich kids called us the two-ton terrors And stayed out of our way Yeah they all went off to fancy schools The town got kind of dry of dogs It was only me and Bill Bill The old fat boy and his hog Them old rich kids all had puppies But I never had no dog It was always me and Bill Bill The old fat boy and his hog Now that was all many years ago And old Bill Bill's a long time gone But things are a whole lot different now 'Bout the best I've ever known Y'see Bill Bill got a little lonesome Brought him a lady friend home one day Now I got ten thousand, eight hundred and seventy two hogs And several more on the way Got me a thirteen thousand dollar pickup truck I'm makin money so dad blamed fast And I married me a fine southern lady And she's teachin me a little class And we just had a little baby boy About as round as he is tall And I reckon I'll call him Bill Bill If he's got any guts at all Them old rich kids all had puppies But I never had no dog It was always me and Bill Bill The old fat boy and his hog DP oct97
Thanks to Mudcat for the Digital Tradition!