The Cuckoo's Nest (John Shiels) One morning fair in Janu'ry, as I roamed for curiosity Down by a neighboring granary along the flowing tide Where the solar rays perplexingly from THE ethereal canopy Displayed a bright transparency, this maiden I espied. She appeared to me some deity, in splendor she was dressed, And courteously accosting me, these words she then expressed, "If experienced in ontology, relate without tautology The pristine aestheology of my cuckoo's nest." I stood in great astonishment and swore I'd suffer banishment Before I to her blandishment would amply comply Dreading some calamity had tainted that curst cavity Or else that same commodity my member might destroy. Then instantly she flattered me, she swore she could not rest And I candidly avow to you that I thought she was distressed For to lay my hand upon her breast she swore she'd be forever blest Had I a moment but caress'd her cuckoo's nest. Now on hearing this repetition of her loose abandon'd condition I took a quick transition and I journeyed on my way But she then pursued me speedily, exhorting me most wickedly Saying, "Sir, you see me sickly, so why DO you not obey?" Her malady appeared to me an amatory pest Unwillingly would I agree unto HER desired behest She said, "Sir, your animosity excites my generosity To show you the curiosity of my cuckoo's nest." Then said I, "My lovely she, pray thank your own audacity For having thus attracted me or else I'd not avail, For it's oft I've heard in history how heroes of antiquity, While striving to gain ascendancy, more often they did fail." "And Solomon, the virtuous man, the wisest and the best And Samson, whom the Philistynes in Gaza did arrest Oh, Hector, Paris, ACHilles, Petrocleus and Hercules All suffered with great Ulysses for the cuckoo's nest. Then she said, "Kind sir, your colloquy is fraught with vain frivolity Desist, unite in gallantry and join in harmony And treat me satisfact'rily and I'll sound your name through Cathary And all along to Drogheda, each town and barony." I must confess I did my best, though knowing I transgress'd And my arms I wrapped around her waist, and I closely her caressed From one to ten this maid to me was lovely, pleased, and kind and free 'Til I at length was forced to flee from her cuckoo's nest. Now I've travelled through Russia and Germany, and o'er the Alps through Italy Around by the isle of Sicily and back again to Spain Naples, Rome and Tuscany, DenMARK and Sweden and Normandy The Netherlands and Saxony, though France and then Lorraine. Silesia, Galicia, the Indies, East and West Britannia and gay Tartary, which Mohammed did possess But in all my rambles ne'er was I reduced to such a low degree As I was when trying to satisfy her cuckoo's nest. SOURCE: Frank Harte (Augusta Heritage Festival, July 1995) note: Harte says:"the song was written by John Shiels the ballad po 'The Rights of Man' and many others." RPf RPf oct96
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