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Old Time Religion (2) It's no good for Billy Graham It's no good for Billy Graham It scares Hell out of Billy Graham But it's good enough for me. We will have a mighty orgy In the honor of Astarte It'll be one helluva party And that's good enough for me. We'll be met by Aphrodite, She looks gorgeous in her nightie She's kind of wild and flighty But she's good enough for me. There will be a lot of lovin' When we're meeting in our coven, Quit your pushin' and your shovin' So there's room enough for me. It was good enough for Sappho With her Lady on her lap-o She put Lesbos on the map-o With her Pagan Poetry. We will go and worship Hermes Though his staff is full of wormies He protects us from the germies And that's good enough for me. We will bow and worship Bacchus And get mighty loud and racchus Then we'll lay us down and facchus And that's good enough for me. We will go and worship Thor He makes all the women sore But they soon come back for more And that's good enough for me. We will all be saved by Mithras We will all be saved by Mithras Slay the Bull, and play the Zithras On that resurrection day. It was good enough for Loki It was good enouqh for Loki He thinks Thor's a little hokey And he's good enough for me. We will all go to Nirvana We will all go to Nirvana Make a left turn at Savannah And we'll see the Promised Land It was good for Old Jehovah He had a son who was a Nova Hey there, Mithras move on ova' A new resurrection day. I hear Valkyries a-coming In the air their song is coming They forgot the words-- they're humming Yet they're good enough for me. There are those who when they've got E Normous problems that are knotty, Just refer them to Hecate, And that's good enough for me. There was a time, so I've heard tell a Fine, upstanding, strong young fella, Gave his all to serve Cybele And that's good enough for me. As the waning year is ending, Young and old souls now are blending, Voices round the circle sending Samhain joy across the worlds. Through the endless night we shiver, Flames around the Yule log quiver As we aim to praise the Giver Of the Sun on Solstice Morn. Pagans gather in the clearing For the end of winter's nearing And the maiden is appearing Bringing promises of spring Light and darkness stand together Leafing birch and flow'ring heather Brethren clad in fur and feather Tell us spring has come again We will all do praise to Horus In an old Egyptian chorus If there's something in it for us Then it's good enough for me Do the rites of old Cthulhu You and me and Mr. Sulu Howling like a drunken Zulu And it's good enough for me We will all sacrifice to Kali Though embracing her is folly She'd be quite an armful - golly And she's good enough for me It was good for old Osirus But what I want to inquire is Can you xerox a papyrus? And it's good enough for me It was good for Dionysis Till one time there came a crisis From a rise in tavern prices And it's good enough for me Well, Pan's pipes got clogged last summer And it really was a bummer Fin'ly had to call the plumber But it's good enough for me Necronomicon? I'll buy one Liber Eibon I'll reply on And the Protocols of Zion They're all good enough for me. We had better worship Neptune, We had better worship Neptune, If we don't we'll all be wet soon, And that's good enough for me. It was good for Bilbo Baggins It was good for Bilbo Baggins Treasure sometimes comes with dragons But it's good enough for me. You can keep your saints and Halos Myrrh, frankincense and aloes Let's toss virgins in volcanoes And that's good enough for me. If you pray to Old Uranus Then your crime is truly heinous You can stick it in your songbook 'Cause it's good enough for me. Let us all join with the Dryads Let us all join with the Dryads Trees may not quite be the Triad But they're good enough for me. Michael Valentine is grokking Clothing usage he is a-topping "Thou art God" the phrase he's dropping And I'm good enough for me. We will venerate the Buddha We will venerate the Buddha He ain't quite the Lion of Judah But he's good enough for me. Always be polite to Witches Always be polite to Witches If you cross them they are bitches And they throw some nasty spells. Oh the ancient goddess Herthus From herself the earth did birth us Were her sins so bad they're worth us? And she's good enough for me. The Episcopals are sav'ed In the Lamb's blood they are bathed While I'm totally depraved And it's good enough for me. That old wondrous fairy - Morgan, Could appreciate an organ Just as long as it was workin' Tho' her prices weren't free Necronomicon's still leading All the others it's exceeding But don't move your lips when reading 'Cause that isn't good for you We will worship old Osirus As we sit and smoke Papyrus We will prob'ly catch a virus But it's good enough for me. If you think these verses floor us Then just write another chorus Just as long as you don't bore us Then it's good enough for me. There's a blacksmith god, --Hephaestus Far ahead of all the rest o'us And his balls are pure asbestos But he's good enough for me. Now there was this wizard, Merlin, Really kept the world a-twirlin' Til he got mixed up in girlin' But he's good enough for me. If your rising sign is Aries, You'll be taken by the fairies, Meet the Buddha in Benares Where he'll hit you with a pie. We will venerate Bubastes We will venerate Bubastes If you like us, then just ask us And that's good enough for me. We will read from the Cabala We will read from the Cabala It won't get you in Valhalla Yet it's good enough for me It was Gerald wrote the ditty And Al Crowley made it pretty Ain't traditional one bitty But it's good enough for me Let us not forget Puck Let us take a leaping fuck Let us wade on through the muck And it's good enough for me We will even worship Hades Though he dwells among the shades He still picks up pretty ladies And he's good enough for me Let's all hug our earthy mother There is nothing that I'd druther She's better than any other And that's good enough for me We will all practice tantra Groans and grunts will be our mantra There's nothing that you can't'a It's good enough for me There are frogs out in the Abyss Armed with athame and Labrys They are green and rather scabrous But they're good enough for me Well, the Japanese use Shinto There's no telling what they're in to It helps them outsell the pinto And that's good enough for me We will bow down to Cuchulain He's got all the women droolin' Tell you brother, I'm not foolin And that's good enough for me Oh the Christians are a humming 'Cause they say their God is Comin' But our God has come two times tonight And the Goddess at least three And the Brave Illuminati Can hail Eris in a body Though we think they're rather dotty They're fun enough for me We will worship old Poseidon And the dolphin he's a-ridin' Though it has a scaly hide on Still that is good enough for me We will run the Lupercalia With our leather paraphernalia Substitute for genitalia, That's not good enough for me We will all go worship Loki And he'll tell a dirty jokie And get locked up in the pokey But that's good enough for me, We will worship like the druids Drinking strange fermented fluids Dancing naked through the wo-ods But that's good enough for me, We will worship Good Old Buddha Of the gods, there are none cutah Comes in silver, brass or pewtah And that's good enough for me, It was good enough for Thor I can hear his thunder roar Or maybe it's his snore But it's good enough for me. There's the God who is a monkey His behavior's kind of funky But he makes a lousy bunkie Still he is good enough for me. We will sacrifice to Kali Though her Thugs don't act too pally When you meet them in an alley She's still good enough for me. We will all go worship Juno For there is one thing we do know She did not burn Brother Bruno Which is good enough for me, We will all go worship Vesta For her cooking is the best a All the food at the fiesta Which is good enough for me. We will visit with the Sidhe [mispronounciation!, does not rhyme] And we'll drink until we're giddy Leave behind Gordon Liddy Which is good enough for me. We will even worship Yoda Who is small as an iota But fulfills his jedi quota Which is good enough for me We will praise the gods of Hagar At a sort of Nordic seder Buy the sacraments from Zabar And that's good enough for me We will hoist a mighty flagon To the Glory of old Dagon And we won't go on the wagon Which is good enough for me. We will bow down to the goddess As she wears her Cretan bodice And the women cry "Come prod us" Which is good enough for me When we gather with Astarte It will be a noisy party For the loving will be hearty And that's good enough for me Here's to Shakespeare's Setebos From the South American Coast To Caliban, he is the most And he's good enough for me Well, those Christians are all humming Cause they say their God is coming; Our God came three times this evening; That's good enough for me. Let us sing to Mother Hera, Papa Zeus had best beware-a, 'Cause his wife's a holy terror -- That's good enough for me. Let us sing one verse to Shiva Because it made me a believer When I saw Parvati's beaver -- It's good enough for me. Let us sing to Mother Isis: She's no female Dionysus, Jut she's okay in a crisis -- She's good enough for me. Let's wave bye-bye to Jehovah, 'Cause his age is almost over -- Patriarchal pigs in clover Ain't good enough for me. You can read of King Osiris And his death-by-kinship virus In some moldy old papyrus -- That's good enough for me. Old Jehovah wants your foreskin -- So Jehovah wants your foreskin? What good to him's one more skin? It's good enough on me Let us raise a toast to Bacchus, We will raise a royal ruckus -- When we'll lay us down and fuck us -- That's good enough for me. There's an Ibis-headed cutie, Keeplng records is his duty, And his name's Tahuti-Frutti -- That's good enough for me. And we'll even sing to Moses, Though his law's no bed of roses. Let him pay us what he owes us -- That's good enough for me. With your trusty old athame You can blast a double whammy -- Or slice and dice salami -- That's good enough for me. There's that bathing beauty, Venus -- She'd just love to lay between us. (There's two ways to take a penis -- Both good enough for me!) There are those who practice Voodoo There are those who practice voodoo I know I do: I hope you do That's good enough for me It may look like knife and chalice, It may look like knife and chalice But it's really quim and phallus -- That's good enough for me. We have lots of fun at Samhain, Everyone has fun at Samhain -- Except perhaps a cowan -- But that's okay by me. Well she raised an awful flurry When she made the scholars worry Thank the gods for Margaret Murray She's good enough for me. At Prodea we're artistic. And a trifle egoistic But above all lesbianistic Its good enough for me. There are some that say its scary When the Papists pray to Mary Her son may be a fairy But she's good enough for me Well it made me a believer When I met that old man Shiva And his Cannibls Sativa It's good enough for me. Let us go and worship Loki He's the old Norse god of chaos Which is why this verse doesn't rhyme or scan -- But it's good enough for me. Well I tried to read the Koran Like some macho Muslim moron But it's just too goddam borin' Not good enough for me. All this Muslim hype on Allah Is immensely hard to swallah I myself prefer Damballah That's good enough for me. When you go to worship Odin You don't need a tie or coat on You just slap a little woad on So it's good enough for me. It was good enough for granny She could cast a double whammy That would knock you on your fanny So it's good enough for me. It's the fruit of all my training And it don't need no explaining Now if it would just stop raining It's good enough for me Jerry Falwell says he's sav-ed In the lamb's blood he is bath-ed And he thinks that I'm deprav-ed But that doesn't bother me Paganism's our life's spices The old God of man entices So just ankh if you love Isis And that's good enough for me Let us sing a verse for Alison A pagan without malice and She's California's talisman She's good enough for me Here is one thing that I do know Jove's favorite is Juno 'Cause she's awfully good at - you know And that's good enough for me. Don't forget about great Isis She'll stand by us in a crisis And she hasn't raised her prices So she's good enough for me. Thanks to great Quetzalcoatl And the sacred Axolotl For the gift of chocolotl And please pass some on to me. We'll sing praises to Apollo Where the Sun God leads we'll follow Tho' his head's a little hollow He's good enough for me. Let us gather in our saunas- When the spirit comes upon us To perform the rites of Faunus That's good enough for me. When you go to California Pagans there'll jump upon ya Well don't say I didn't warn ya You heard it first from me. We will all bow down to Lilith 'Cause she doeth what she willith When she willth Lilith killith But it's good enough for me. When we all bowed down to Nuit There was really nothing to it Uncle Alex made us do it That's good enough for me. It's not good enough for Reagan It's not good enough for Reagan He's too square to be a Pagan But it's good enough for me. Nous nous appellons Druides Et nous sommes de l'Atlantide C'est peut-etre un peu stupide Mais c'est bon mon avis (We call ourselves Druids We come from Atlantis Maybe that's stupld, but It's good enough for me.) Meeting at the Wltching Hour By the Bud and Branch and Flower Folks are raising up the power And that's where I want to be. Note: Mo' yet. Pretty soon we'll put a moratorium on these. AB, SOF
Thanks to Mudcat for the Digital Tradition!